Okay yall, It’s common knowledge that during sex, things may not always go as planned. We’ve all had moments that have either made us cringe or bust out in laughter. Be prepared when sexual mishaps occur; read up on five common Ooops moments and how to recover from them.
Ooops #1: You let one out as you climax. How to react: If you’re riding your stud, almost to completion, and you let out flatulence, there is something you can do that doesn’t include you hoping the bed would swallow you whole. If it happens once, don’t act like it didn’t happen. Apologize and, if possible, crack a joke about how you didn’t think proper gas etiquette was extended to the bedroom. If your partner is a decent person, you both can easily laugh it off; flatulence is a normal bodily function, after all. For some, however, it can be a frequent occurrence due to medical conditions that cause excessive gas. Keep in mind that flatulence is also very common during anal sex: once your partner pulls out, air needs to be expelled. So be prepared with some music playing and a few scented candles nearby. lol!!!!
Ooops #2: You hurt him. How to react: Things can get rough in the bedroom, so hard slaps, nail marks, bite marks and hair pulling can be common and the way I like it but I digress; However, if you accidentally elbow your partner in the gut, mouth or the eye, that’ll hurt a lot more, especially since it came unexpectedly. Admittedly, there’s nothing you can do to cover up, save for telling them you were so enthralled by them and their performance that you had no control over your body. I suggest you apologize profusely, have a good laugh over it—c’mon, it’s pretty funny...shit!!! and once your mortification subsides - then suggestively offer to help with the healing.
Ooops#3: You don’t orgasm. How to react: To fake or not to fake? That is the eternal question, right. It seems that some partners are none the wiser a good portion of the time, while some can be perceptive and get hurt. However, faking will be of little benefit to you, as your partner will not know and continue to “please” you the best they knows how. Instead of masking your non-existent orgasm, just teach them the surefire way to get you revved-up. And if you yourself don’t know, it’s time you did a little self-discovery....so explore!!!
Ooops#4: You call out another guy’s/gals name. How to react: This is a trickier one. You certainly wouldn’t like it if a partner called out another name during sex! But if you let a name other than theirs slip out of your mouth while in ecstasy, think fast: if you accidentally called out “Brad”, for example, you can tell him that you meant Brad Pitt. It’ll be less of an issue if it’s a celebrity, and you can playfully suggest that he can call you “Angelina” next time. However, if Brad is the name of your ex-boyfriend, well, your up shits creek and that may take a bit longer to fix, I suggest Loud Music!!!!!!
Ooops#5: You spit rather than swallow. How to react: Every woman falls into either the spit or swallow camps, and either one is fine. Just be sure, however, to tell your partner which side you’re on beforehand. There’s nothing worse for a guy/ girl than seeing the look of distaste on your face as you try to let it go down or, worse, spitting it out in disgust. If you’re a spitter, have a tissue or cup nearby; or just request your guy/girl not ejaculate/cum in your mouth. Communicating your preference from the get-go will minimize embarrassment and slaps across the face situations later on.
NOW HOORAY FOR GAY BUT MISS THANG THIS IS NOT IT IT!!!, NO THIS IS JUST HORRID AND BOSO THE CLOWNISH....I CANT HELP BUT TO THINK IS SHE ON DRUGS, THIS WOULD BE MY MUG SHOT PICTURE FOR GOING TO JAIL FOR WHOOPING MY BEAUTICIANS ASS. THERE IS NOT EVEN MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS, ITS NOT FASHION ITS JUST BEING SELFISH ....BITCH ONE COLOR AT A TIME! IF YOU MUST DO THE CLOWN COLORS.
AS A WOMAN WITH LARGE BREAST, LET ME FIRST SAY I SHOW OFF MY BUST PROUDLY. HOWEVER THIS IS CLEAVAGE OVERLOAD, THIS IS NOT EVEN DONE IN A TASTEFUL WAY. THIS IS CALLED BUSTING OUT OF YOUR SHIRT ALSO KNOWN AS NOT SEXY....AND GUESS WHAT IT MAKES YOU LOOK BIGGER THAN WHAT YOU ARE!!!
NOW LADIES THIS IS THE PROBLEM, FASHION IS MEANT FOR EVERYONE ....BUT ALL CLOTHES ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL! WHEN A PLUMPER GIRL WEARS A FASHIONABLE BELLY SHIRT, IT JUST ENDS UP LOOKING LIKE A SMALL SHIRT THAT'S TOO LITTLE FOR YOU. THIS IS NOT A SUITABLE FASHION LOOK FOR A PLUMP WOMAN OF THIS SIZE...TO BE HONEST SOME FASHION MAGAZINES WOULD TELL YOU THAT THIS LOOK CAN BE ACHIEVED FOR PLUMPER GIRLS, JUST BY ADDING A CAMISOLE. BUT I SAY NO!!!! I DON'T LIKE THAT LOOK IN FACT IT INFURIATES ME EVEN MORE THAT YOU LOOK STUFFED. BUT IF YOU MUST I GUESS THAT'S THE BETTER OPTION THEN PEOPLE WITH LOOKS OF DISGUST ON THEIR FACES AS YOU WALK BY.
OKAY THIS IS AN EXAMPLE OF A TOE VIOLATION....LADIES, WE ALL LOVE SHOES!!!!
